Contentment.

I have this grand idea of how I want my future to look: where I want to be, what I want to be doing, and who I want to be with. However, I’ve found that my plans aren’t usually God’s. Even when my desires are good, they’re not always best. I’ve been frustrated, upset, and impatient in the last year or so. I think I know what I want. I think I know my ideal plan for the future. And yet I have been convicted that God has something very different for me in store.

Right now I’m going to school. I’m majoring in Biology. I’m living in the United States. I’m considering medical school in the future.

If I had my own way, I would not be in school, I would not be majoring in Biology, I probably wouldn’t be living in the United States, and I wouldn’t  think twice about medical school.

But for some reason I know I’m right where I’m supposed to be. This is right.

I think I’m finally coming to the place where I want God’s plan for my life more than my own. Ultimately, my life is not my own. I’m finally coming to the place where I can say that I want God’s plans to be my plans., even if this means giving up my idea of what life should look like.

This summer I went out to Indian food with my mom for lunch. During our conversation, I described to her my ideal future. I described to her where I thought I’d be the most content: where I’d be happiest. While she agreed that my plan did sound pretty awesome, she brought up a simple question that I had simply ignored.  What if God has a different plan? Would I be happy then?

At the time I honestly don’t think I could have said yes. However, as I’ve spent more time in the Word and getting to know God, I think I can. The more time I invest in my relationship with Jesus Christ, the more I realize that I only want to be where He wants me. I only want to be doing what he wants me to do. And I only want to be with whomever He has for me.

There is no greater or more perfect a plan that the one God has designed for me.

I don’t think I ever realized before this summer that God only has good in store for those who love Him. Will His plan for my life be the most comfortable? Probably not. Will I be happy all the time? Not likely. Will I know that there is no plan more perfect than God’s? Yes. Can I find immeasurable joy in that? Most definitely.

Jeremiah 29:11-13

For I know the plans I have for,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”